Glossier Hits & Misses

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Showing up three years late to the Glossier party like, hey.

Glossier is probably one of the most talked about beauty brands in the blogosphere since its launch in 2014. It seems like everyone I follow raves about their products. This year was a big year for them with new beauty launches and an international expansion to the UK. Though I’ve followed the brand since its inception (I still remember the Into the Gloss post announcing it!), I only just got around to testing their products. Forever late to the party!

A few weeks ago I took the plunge and made a small order. Ok, ok, fine. It was a massive order! But I’d been dying to try out Glossier products for ages. I put it off for so long because I couldn’t find any non-biased reviews from non-Glossier reps, which made me a bit suspicious. Could it really be that good? This year, loads of bloggers published more balanced, honest reviews. With their advice, I went ahead and picked up what I thought would work best for my skincare and makeup needs. After testing out my purchases, I’m pleased to report that the vast majority are awesome! Even the not-so-great items really weren’t dreadful. Not a lot of regrets here!


Milky Jelly Cleanser

I must say, Glossier did a great job naming this. “Milky jelly” is exactly the right description. Before, I always assumed it would be just a dupe of my other gel cleansers, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. When applied, the Milky Jelly Cleanser feels nothing like my gel cleansers. The best description I could give is that it’s a thick, gloopy, almost gelatinous jelly that dissolves into a clear liquid gel on wet skin. I don’t have the right words to describe it! It’s so soothing and deeply hydrating, but in a way my other gel cleansers aren’t. My other cleansers don’t leave nearly enough moisture on my skin as this does! You could almost get away without putting on moisturizer afterward. It’s that hydrating! If there is one product you have to check out from Glossier it’s this!

Boy Brow

If Allure loved Glossier’s Boy Brow so much that they gave it an award, then it has to be good! With brow products, I tend to stick with cheap ones from the drugstore, but the glowing reviews for Glossier’s option made me rethink my love affair with cheap brow gels. I picked up the clear version, afraid the tinted ones wouldn’t be the right shade for my weirdo light-dark brows. After testing this a few times, I can safely say that I won’t be going back to the drugstore anymore! This does not budge! Even when yanking turtlenecks or sweaters over your face. It’s like cement for your brows but in a good way. With this, unruly brows look neat and cleaned up. Plus, it doesn’t leave them all crunchy or crusty. New holy grail item?! Most definitely!

Moisturizing Moon Mask

It’s winter, which means I wage a daily war with my stubbornly flakey skin. Why is it so hard to have glowy skin like those Glossier models? Alas, I was not blessed with dewy, clear skin genes. As a result, I tend to hoard all skincare products that say “hydrating”, “gentle” or “moisturizing” on their label. Thankfully some items I pick up work like a dream and deliver glowy skin. The Moisturizing Moon Mask is one of those blessed items. I have a number of hydrating masks in my collection, but none feel like this one. Its texture reminds me of a cross between a greek yogurt and a gel. I slap this baby on whenever my skin is feeling like the Sahara desert and twenty minutes later my skin is baby soft and plump. It’s pretty freakin’ awesome!

Cloud Paint

This year was the year I discovered the wonders of a good blush. I’ve since stuck to powder options, fearful of cream blushers because let’s be real, they are intimidating. Cream blush just seems more high maintenance. However, I was willing to conquer my fears for the Glossier Cloud Paint because the bloggers I faithfully follow adore this little tube of gorgeous cheek tint. I love it! I chose the shade Dusk, which is a beautiful everyday pinky, orangey, bronzey color. This glides onto your cheeks and blends out so easily you’ll question why you were ever so fearful of liquid blushes in the first place. I like to apply it with my hands or with a damp Beauty Blender. Be careful! A little goes a long way! You seriously only need a tiny drop or two of this. It’s that pigmented. If you’re in the market for a fuss-free blush that looks natural on the skin, Cloud Paint is a great option!


Priming Moisturizer in Rich

You already know I love a good, heavy moisturizer so it probably comes as no surprise that I chose the Glossier Priming Moisturizer in Rich. As a moisturizer junkie, this faces a lot of competition from my hefty lineup. Now, this isn’t a bad egg. In fact, I’d say this moisturizer is decent and I think many people would love it. It’s a thick, velvety cream with a fresh lavender scent that leaves your skin feeling just hydrated enough. However, I wasn’t wild about it. My skin just needs more help than this can give! I bought this to use in the evening as a replacement for my now empty Clinique Moisture Surge Intense. I initially enjoyed it and brought it with me on a recent trip to D.C. to test it out. Oh boy, did I regret it! My skin went haywire with a new cystic pimple popping up every day. (NOTE: This wasn’t caused by the moisturizer! My skin acts up every once in a while.) This moisturizer didn’t soothe my angry skin like my Clinique one did. It also didn’t resolve all of my dry skin problems. That being said, I still like this and will continue using it as a day cream instead of a night cream. This might be a product that’ll work better in the summer when my skin isn’t as dry.


Mega Greens Galaxy Mask

I’ll be honest, I purchased the Mega Greens Galaxy Mask because of its cool name. And besides, I’m always on the hunt for detoxifying clay masks. This claims to clear out any excess oil while still leaving your face soothed and calm. And while it did deliver on its calming qualities (I don’t think I’ve ever used such a gentle clay mask), it didn’t do anything to help reduce the size of my pores. Sure, my skin felt nice afterward, but pretty much any decent face mask can do that. My problem was that it just didn’t do anything drastic. Or anything at all? I think this is definitely a pass for me.

Generation G Lipstick

Ok. Fair warning, I’m cheating a bit here. This negative review isn’t against the actual lipstick. In fact, I really enjoyed the formula of the Generation G Lipstick. It’s easy to apply and leaves just enough hydration so your lips don’t get chapped. The only downside is the sort of chalky taste, but I can live with that. What I was disappointed with was the shade I bought, Cake. It looked like the perfect everyday nude for me. I’d seen bloggers sport it and look amazing (hello, Allana Davidson!). I’d seen the application video on the Glossier website. I was sold. This was going to be my signature nude lip color. I swiped this on my lips, looked in the mirror and was confused. It looked like hadn’t put anything on them! Ok, they were slightly pinky, bronzey but just barely. I tried to build it up with no luck. Even on the back of my hand, this takes a good 5 or 6 layers to even show up! Obviously, this is a very personal review since I’m certain this shade looks different on everyone. But, ugh, I just spent $18 for a lipstick that looks like nothing! To make matters worse, I accidentally bought two of them so now I have an extra that I’ll never use.

Glossier You

I almost forgot to review this! Earlier this year, Glossier launched their first fragrance, Glossier You, with a bang. They even built a new chic red-themed showroom in New York. It seems like every blogger who got a sample or purchased this loves it. I was eager to check it out and was happy to see that you could choose to add a free sample of it to your order. I’m not as impressed as everyone is. It’s sold as a personal fragrance that, like the Molecule 01 perfume that reacts to your skin to give off a unique scent, is supposed to smell like you. I thought it smelled like a middle-aged woman. Ok, that sounds bad… Just sort of more mature feeling. Not really youthful if you get my drift.

Whew! If you’re reading this, you made it to the end! Were you impressed with the Glossier range or did it not live up to the online hype? Any of your favs I need to check out? Let me know in the comments!



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